No Financial Aid for International Students

THERE IS NO FINANCIAL AID FOR INTERNATIONAL STUDENTS.  (EXCEPTIONS ARE FOR HARVARD-QUALITY students if Harvard accepts them and, if any small liberal arts colleges in the midwest accept them).

Why am I bringing this up?  

The middle daughter went to her orientation at UC Davis this past week with Daddy.  There were lots of questions about Financial Aid. I often check on CollegeConfidential.com which has lots of questions and answer forums on everything involving colleges and universities.  We have been saving our pennies and tightening our budget because we also received no financial aid.

Well, ANYWAY something peaked my interest on that site.  Some kid from India (?) was complaining that while he got into Cornell, he received a letter stating that he wouldn't be receiving any financial aid, and "payment due".  He was furious and stated basically that Cornell had been his dream and that all of his future hopes had been dashed because Cornell chose to not put him on a full scholarship.  My answer to that:  Why isn't your dream in your country and on your own dime?

YOU GOTTA PAY TO PLAY

I'm really not trying to be elitist or arrogant but dang it, I'm tired of paying for others who have filled up our universities and caused our tuitions to rise; and I'm tired of not being able to afford an education for my own bright children because my dollars fund people who feel entitled to my hard-earned money.  My TEXAN-born father worked the hot blistering fields of south texas picking cotton, and vegetables.  My mother wore her hands raw cleaning and cooking.  We are not rich.

International students really have some gall!  One girl mentioned that she needed financial aid because her parents were refusing to pay and she needed immediate money; so she wanted a government funded, subsidized student loan (only available to US students) and that she was willing to do Work Study (only available to US students) on a student visa. She had done something that really upset her parents and was caught; she said initially she was concerned about being caught, but wasn't too worried about what she had done!!

One kid actually said that his countrymen should be fully funded because Americans make more money annually than what India makes annually so, America owes them and has to pay for their education; I can tell you how popular that was on the forums.

Many of these students expect to be admitted, fully-funded and then given work and immigration; or  go back to their countries with their American education and sell us their products.  They come from certain countries and are very arrogant.  I guess they don't understand that I, like most American's have been paying taxes to the IRS for 35+ years.  My taxes fund the US government. The US government funds universities and programs.  People in the US would be really pissed off if immigrants were funded before tax-paying Americans.

One girl, in my daughter's graduating class also got into Cornell.  She applied for a $1000 scholarship (that she didn't get) because her parents would be footing the bill for a $60K year university.  As far as I know, they're taking out a home equity loan.  We've been squirreling away sock money to pay for our daughters' educations and we're not "rich".

My advice is:
If you come here as a student, pay your own way, don't expect us to foot your bill for your education.
Better yet, stay home, use your country's assets to educate yourself.
You can't work for money here on a student visa.  Our economy is bad, if we don't have jobs for our citizens, you think we have a job for you?

The Aurora shootings and Mental Health help.

Dear All:  I normally don't write about tragedies but I had to write on this one; it has drastically affected me because I just don't understand why things like this continue to happen.  Exactly about 1 year ago, a number of young people were killed in Norway.  Why are people attacking our youth???

The people in Aurora were going to see a movie; most of them were very young.  What a horrible waste of life!  I'm thinking of the families who are suffering, along with the rest of our country, and it really saddens me.  We need prayers!  Lots of prayers, please. I don't see the solution being about gun control, but it would certainly help.

Please spread the word about Mental Health Professionals-

I have wanted to rant and rave about mental health professionals for quite a while, and that taking advantage of their services is a good thing. So many people go to school, FOR YEARS, to learn to work with people who need mental health services.  People of the general population don't really take advantage of that help.  Agencies have good resources for mental health professionals that the families can access when finances are limited.   These are really good people who are psychologists, licensed clinical social workers, psychiatrists, counselors, etc.  I work in tandem with these allied health professionals and these are some of the most dedicated people in the world.  These are people who also face the trials of daily living, but the difference is that they've been specially trained to work with people who need help.  

So the shooter is from San Diego and the mother confirmed that he was "the right one" arrested.  Mom knew.  I don't want to second-guess why the family knew that their son was a ticking time bomb and that he obviously didn't get the mental health help he needed.

 I "get" that some people run out of money, medications, and opportunities to meet with mental health professionals.  I "get" that people with severe mental illness don't think there is anything wrong and they balk at therapy and help.  Please, continue to seek help for your family member and for yourself as well.  Each county usually has some type of mental health services program that is accessible on a sliding fee scale.   The point is that if you know your child is a future basket case, please keep searching for help!!!!  If you face roadblocks, please keep trying.  We need sanity in this crazy world.  Please help  keep the peace for our kids!

People with last names, at the end of the alphabet, are tired of always being LAST!!!!

My daughter made me realize something that has slowly started to bother me and I shouldn't let it affect me, BUT IT DOES.

My daughter will be going away to college and when I went to her "accepted students" day, I was kind of disappointed. that the same rule applied at UCDavis, as those rules in every school.  If you are blessed with a name that is at the end of the alphabet, you're an "afterthought" and always DEAD LAST!!!  Everything at the end of the line, runs-out!

At the Davis "meet and greet", people with last names from A through F(?), got to go into the new, clean dorm tour at the CENTER of the campus, G through M (?) went into the next closest area, and N through S went a little further out. But those of us with last names T through Z got screwed.  We had to walk way the heck off campus, after we had been on a long walking tour of the campus. The other dorm tours were packed!  Our dorm tour was lucky to get 5 people. Why has it, and will it continue to be that our last names always puts us at the tail end of everything?  Now you could say that having only 5 people on the tour was advantageous to seeing the rooms.  Nope, we had to climb up and down several flights of stairs, on an extremely warm day,  no elevators.  (Not good when you have been carting all of your paper junk, jackets, bags and everything else since 7:30 am because there is no parking.)  I suspect this is true at most campuses.

HISTORICAL EXPERIENCES

Whenever there was any kind of activity, when my kids were at school, camp, swim, anything, they were always placed in the LAST group such that things always ran-out or would be sent later,  or the group would have to be formed with 8 people instead of 5, etc.

Time Magazine (Time Article) reported on a study of last names and the shopping habits of those people whose last names were at the END of the alphabet.  The study found that people with names at the end of the alphabet, do not procrastinate when there are purchases to be made.  The suggestion was that we "last alphabetters" don't really want to miss out because we were and have been accustomed to always being last, and, we take advantage of things in a timely manner.  This is probably very true.  It doesn't really suggest that we don't read things well, or make carefully thought-out purchases, it only suggests that we jump at good opportunities because everything always comes last to us.  Sounds reasonable to me.

BUTTTTTT, I have always tried to make it up to my kids by trying to say positive things like:  "Good things come to those who wait."   "People who are last, always get the best".  I had to say something like that because the only people who would understand our last name issues were those teachers who were named:  Miss. Wright, Ms. Young, Mr. Washington, Ms. Zellner, etc.  They were sympathetic and mixed-up the order of the kids.  When I taught, I tried to do it according to birthdays:  Jan - April, May -August, Sept to Dec.  When that didn't work, I grouped backward or did it by color table.  I TRIED TO BE FAIR AND ROTATED WHENEVER I COULD.

So, now that our 2nd kid is going to her summer "orientation",  you can bet she will be organized in alphabetical order.  I take very little solace in knowing that all over the country, a number of families will be experiencing the same mindset.  (Yep our older child has already been through this)

Yep,  I hate to break it to my husband that he is in for a lot of walking and will have a really long day because he is at the very end of the alphabet!  Got nothin' but love for you for doing this task, sweetie!!!   Sucks and Bites big time!!!

Why we didn't go to Comic Con this year.

Photo Courtesy of Victor Perez

There are visitors from all over the place at Comic-Con today; and for the first time in years, we didn't go this year-2012.  If you're unfamiliar with the Con, let me tell you a little about it.  

Waiting to cross Harbor Blvd.

ATTENDING COMIC CON

lines face Coronado Island

Comic Con is relatively inexpensive to attend.  Last year I think we paid $30 per adult, per day to attend; unless you get the 4-day pass and then it's even less expensive.  There are five of us so the teens get a discounted rate of $15.  Everything is done online. (4-day tickets for the following year's Comic Con are also sold on-site and sell-out- lines are LONG!)  
The San Diego Convention Center is perfect for it, as far as dividing all of the areas needed, but they really do need more space-they're working on it.  Behind the convention center is a park and the harbor (with a Joe's Crab Shack).  The Summer Pops Concert Venue is also there.  While people are waiting in outdoor lines, they have fantastic views of the harbor as well as feeling the coastal breezes.  The Con provides tents for shade while waiting outside.  They also provide a color coded shuttle system to take you back and forth to your hotels.  Works even if your hotel is 7 blocks away!!!  If the Con were to move to LA or to Anaheim, the ambiance would be completely contrary to the Comic Con way of thinking.

CHECKING IN

Line of 5 hours!

The day starts at 8 am.  That's when the people are at the doors waiting for it to open.  There are thousands of people in costumes from every type of character ever drawn, created or imagined.  Newbies need to first check in at area E and then they are allowed to enter the hall.  Everyone is immediately directed to the escalators which leads to an upstairs pavilion where there are dozens, if not hundreds of people checking you in.  These lines move extremely fast.  The staff knows what they are doing.  They hand you your badges and point you in the direction of the people handing out programs and 4 to 5ft-sized comic bags to, either arrange in backpack style, or to carry like messenger bags.

Lines wrap around park

There are lines everywhere!  This pavilion is where you get your reservations to get into another line later to meet artists, cartoonists or whomever.  So, people are in line, to have a ticket, to get into another line later, get it?  
The programs are generally mailed out or are online, so if you go through your previously mailed program, you'll know who and what to expect.  At the Con, they let you know if there are changes-sometimes.  They do have information people in a tent.  The programs tell you which halls have which shows, movies and stars.  Ballroom 20 holds about 7000.  Hall H is huge'r-we were never able to get in.  Now comes the important part, the popular shows and draws have waiting lines that begin days before the Con.  You may or may not be able to get in, so expect a LONG WAIT at some-4 to 5 hour waits are common!  People who have been going to Comic Con are very patient. 

Hotel Sponsor

Downstairs is the exhibit hall with all of the sponsors, gamers, shows, and artists.  It is wall to wall people.  Thank goodness this year they prohibited strollers!!!!  Seriously, who brings babies to these types of things????  The exhibit halls are where everyone sees everyone, of every size, smashed into storm trooper uniforms or spiderman's and batman's.    This is where, if you have an earlier ticket from the pavilion, you get into another line at the "sponsors booths" to get autographs, demo games, or meet artists-Warner Bros. DC, Marvel Comics, Disney, Pixar, Nintendo, etc.

Harbor Blvd to Gaslamp quarter

Across the street from the convention center is the Downtown Gaslamp Quarter-Restaurants, Bars and "Party Central".  It's a constant "New Years Eve" atmosphere during the Con.  A number of Comic Con Vendors give out their crap in this area.  There are warehouses that have been rented out by Cartoon Network, Pepsi and Coke vendors, Movie studios, and others etc.  You name it, they got it!    Just obey traffic rules and watch out for the trains and the trolley.  

Waiting for Orange Shuttle

"Orange" shuttle to hotel:  Already asleep!!!

OKAY SO WHY DIDN'T WE GO THIS YEAR??? 

1. Tickets were so confusing this year; the system always crashed and after we jumped through the first and second hurdles, it just didn't seem to be worth it.  My husband and I have jobs; yes, we are fortunate enough to be able to have a job, and, waiting for a system to keep crashing just was too much.
2. I'm not into comics and neither is the hubby.  Movie stars are not that big a deal to us either.  We were only doing it for the kids and our kids were trying to get summer jobs this year.  We didn't know if they would be able to go. (one kid is finally employed! and another one is still waiting and looking, our third child is taking a class).
3. The people who are now jumping on the bandwagon, seem to be ruder than years past-they push in front of you and have no respect.  I have impressionable teens.  The geeksquad nowadays comes in the form of females who need attention and dress very inappropriately.  One lady was in front of my teen son-with a large hole cut out of her pants and no underwear!  Problem:  she smelled, and she was very overweight-tight convention area with her exposed nasty butt!  Who wants that????
4. We typically would stay downtown to save time on getting to the Con early.  The only hotel downtown that lets you book (WAY) in advance was the Indigo. (on the other downtown hotels, you have to basically wait for the lotto-no guarantee that you'll get a downtown hotel) Very nice hotel, but you are billed "cash upfront" on your room rate-That's $400 per night!!!  Just too expensive but we noticed that a lot of the movie execs stayed there.
5. It is very tiring day at the Con, they (purposely) don't have seating, and, THEY really don't want you sitting on the floor-safety??  You take a shuttle to your room and fall sleep at 3 pm!!! Our hotel was less than 7 blocks and our kids fell asleep right after sitting down!!  
6. LINES, LINES, AND MORE LINES!  It's not for someone who is in the middle-age prime of their lives (like me).  This convention really is for the young.  By that I mean-middle school age-to young adult (late 20's at the most).   Marrieds with teen kids would be okay.  FACE FACTS:  You need a lot of energy to stay alert and the people with the most energy at COMIC Con are the young.

SD Convention Center

Cartoon Network

GASLAMP=Party Central!

Waiting for free shuttles

Harbor Blvd in SanDiego

Afternoons are very tiring, less people outside, more inside.

Southern California Weather

Okay, so supposedly we live in "sunny" San Diego.  People from out of town, NOW HEAR THIS!!  YOU need to plan for our weather in the summer!  Yes we have sun- a lot-and yes we get coastal breezes.  We don't get the humid heat of the East Coast, BUT, you people need to plan!  We get OVERCAST skies at the beach, and (NEWSFLASH!!) it gets cold.  No, it's not 40 degrees, but it gets chilly in the 60's.  And, if you assume you're going to be in Hawaiian tropical weather, you've packed the wrong things!  We saw a number of people freezing who just didn't wear the right clothes for an overcast beach.

My family and I had a Staycation at Mission Beach this week.  There were tons of license plates from Arizona.  I guess the desert weather can fry the brain.  These fools planned for Arizona evenings and you could tell they didn't plan well:  all of them purchased sweatshirts from Hamels!  San Diego can get warm, but more than likely, you will have to deal with cool weather-so bring a sweatshirt or windbreaker especially for your LITTLE ONES!  

We went to a Luau at the Catamaran.  In the summer, the Bahia/Catamaran hosts a weekly Luau on Fridays.  We bought our tickets at the hotel shop at the Bahia.  I think we paid $37 for the Luau and show.  It had been somewhat cloudy, but warm during the day.  My kids did get sunburned!

But as the evening cooled, you would think these people would have the sense to bring a jacket.  Nope, lots of skimpy luau dresses and no jackets = frozen butts!

Our close view!

One guy kept standing in front of our table trying to keep warm thus blocking our view!  What a moron!  

San Diego is a great place to live 365 days a year, but you have to have a light jacket every once in a while.  Yes, EVEN in the SUMMER!

Moron who kept blocking our view trying to keep warm.

Samoan dancers keep warm by their energy!

Think of the War Album (CD), but plan for cool evenings:

SUMMER

Riding round town with all the windows down, eight track playing all your favorite sounds

The rhythm of the bongos fill the parkThe street musicians trying to get a start
'Cause it's summer, summer time is hereYes, it's summer, my time of yearYes, it's summer, my time of year
Stretched out on a blanket in the sandKids of all ages digging DisneylandRapping on the C B radio in your vanWe'll give a big ten four to the truckin' man

Samoan dancers!

'Cause it's summer, summer time is hereYes, it's summer, my time of yearYes, it's summer, my time of year
Young boys playin' stick ball in the streetFire hydrants help to beat the heatOld man feeding pigeons in the squareNighttime finds young lovers walkin' there, oh yeah
'Cause it's summer, summer time is hereYes, it's summer, my time of year
In Atlantic City or out in MalibuOr anywhere between, I am telling youWhen you feel those balmy breezes on your faceSummer time is the best time any place, oh yeah
'Cause it's summer, summer time is hereYes, it's summer, my time of year
'Cause it's summer, oh yeah, summer time is here, yes it isYes, it's summer, my time of year

Man trying to keep his kid warm.

At Seventeen-Janis Ian's song

I bought this album from Circulation in Hillcrest.
It's one I wanted when I was younger but never bought it.

Remembering the pressures of youth via this beautiful song in 1975-1976 brought back a lot of memories.  Girls are so impressionable at this age and this song was wriiten and sung beautifully for our girls who aren't "perfect" but are WONDERFUL, TALENTED AND BEAUTIFUL:   

Janis Ian at 1976 Grammy's performing "At Seventeen".

AT SEVENTEEN           By Janis Ian            

I learned the truth at seventeen
That love was meant for beauty queens
And high school girls with clear skinned smiles-married young and then retired

The valentines I never knew
The Friday night charades of youth
Were spent on one more beautiful
At seventeen I learned the truth…

And those of us with ravaged faces
Lacking in the social graces
Desperately remained at home
Inventing lovers on the phone
Who called to say "come dance with me"
And murmured vague obscenities
It isn't all it seems at seventeen…

A brown-eyed girl in hand-me-downs
Whose name I never could pronounce
Said: "Pity please the ones who serve
They only get what they deserve"

The rich-relationed hometown queen
Marries into what she needs
With a guarantee of company
And haven for the elderly… 

Remember those who win the game
Lose the love they sought to gain
In debitures of quality and dubious integrity
Their small-town eyes will gape at you
In dull surprise when payment due
Exceeds accounts received at seventeen…

To those of us who knew the pain
Of valentines that never came
And those whose names were never called
When choosing sides for basketball

It was long ago and far away
the world was younger than today
when dreams were all they gave for free
to ugly duckling girls like me…

We all play the game, and when we dare
We cheat ourselves at solitaire
Inventing lovers on the phone
Repenting other lives unknown
That call and say: "Come on, dance with me"
And murmur vague obscenities

At ugly girls like me, at seventeen...

Okay, so this past week I posted pictures of strawberries that I got from the Stater Brothers grocery store.  The berries were large, fragrant and sweet so, naturally, my family ate them all.   I was very impressed by the quality of the berry.  The color was a deep red/maroon. The berries got me thinking about a story I had received from a colleague, Valerie Orozco, who taught Spanish at the high school, where I worked.  She gave me an English and Spanish copy that she used in her classroom.  I thought it was beautiful!  I recently looked for her story but couldn't find her original, but I found something similar.   I hope you like it!

"Strawberries- A Cherokee tale-Author unknown

Long ago, in the first days of the world, there lived 1st Man and 1st Woman. They lived together as husband and wife in happiness and harmony. They loved each other very much.


One day they quarreled. Although neither later could remember what the quarrel was about, the pain grew stronger with every word that was spoken, until finally, in anger and grief, the woman left their home and began walking east, toward the rising sun.



1st Man sat alone in his house. As minutes became hours he grew lonelier and lonelier. The anger left him and all that remained was a terrible grief and despair, and he began to cry.
 
A spirit heard 1st Man crying and took pity on him. “Why do you cry?”

1st Man said, “My wife has left me.”

 Spirit said, “Why did your woman leave?”

1st Man just hung his head and said nothing. “Did you quarrel with her?” asked the spirit.

1st Man nodded.  “Would you quarrel with her again?” asked the spirit.  “No, I only want to live with her as before, in peace, happiness, harmony and love.”
 “I have seen your woman,” said the spirit. “She is walking east toward the rising sun.”

1st Man began walking east but could not catch up with her. Everyone knows how fast an angry woman walks. The spirit said, “I will go on ahead and see if I can slow her steps.”

The spirit found the woman walking fast, her footsteps angry and her gaze fixed straight ahead. She looked neither to the right or left, and pain and anger were in her heart. The spirit saw some huckleberry bushes along the trail, and with a wave of the hand made the bushes burst into bloom and ripen with fruit. But the woman looked neither to the right nor to the left, and her footsteps didn’t slow.  The spirit saw other berry bushes along the trail, and, with a wave of the hand, caused them to burst into bloom and then into ripe fruit. But still 1st Woman looked neither to the right nor to the left and there was anger and pain in her heart.


Along the trail grew peach trees, pear trees, apple trees, and cherry trees. With a wave of the hand, the spirit caused the trees to bloom and then fruit to ripen on all the trees. Still,

1st Woman looked neither to the right nor to the left. She saw nothing but her pain and her steps didn’t slow.


And then the spirit had an idea. “I will create a new fruit, one that grows very close to the ground so that when the woman bends down to pick the fruit all the anger and pain will pour out of her heart onto the ground. With a wave of the hand the forest floor was covered with a thick green carpet of leaves. Then another wave and the carpet became starred with tiny white flowers, and each flower ripened into a berry that was the color and shape of the human heart.



As 1st Woman walked, she crushed some of the berries, and the delicious aroma came up to her nose. She stopped and smelled, and smelled again, and then she looked down and saw the berries that were the color and the shape of the human heart. She bent down and picked one and all the anger and pain flowed out of her heart. She picked another and another, and the taste was as sweet as love itself.

As she picked she leaned down and she saw her husband coming behind her. In her heart the anger was gone and all that remained was the love she had always felt for him. 
And so, she picked more berries and fed them to him as he arrived. Together they picked this new fruit, fed it to each other, and gathered some to take home. They returned to their home where they lived out their days in peace, happiness, harmony and love.

 And that is how the world’s first strawberries brought peace between men and women, and that is why to this very day they are called “the berries of love.” "